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Would you please put them back in the kitchen when you’re finished? Ed., LPC-S, a certified Gottman therapist and master trainer for The Gottman Institute“The number one thing I have learned about love is that it is a trade and a social exchange, not just a feeling.

Hang out with girlfriends until late in the evening, take a weekend trip to visit family, or just spend time ‘doing you’ for a while. D., assistant professor of communication, Texas State University“‘You are my everything’ is a lousy pop-song lyric and an even worse relationship plan. Create relationships outside The Relationship, or The Relationship isn’t going to work anymore.”— Matt Lundquist, LCSW, couples therapist“Sex isn’t just about orgasms.Many times an issue is brought up by attacking or blaming one’s partner, also known as criticism, and one of the killers of a relationship. Instead of saying, ‘You always leave your dishes all over the place! ’ try a more gentle approach, focusing on your own emotional reaction and a positive request.For example: ‘I get annoyed when I see dishes in the living room.When you decide to learn to love yourself rather than continue to abandon yourself, you will discover how to create a loving relationship with your partner.”— Margaret Paul, Ph.D., relationship expert and co-creator of Inner Bonding“Many times people become increasingly shy with the person they love the more as time goes by.

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