Dating an unemotional person
“Most people don’t want to feel the pain, or the grief, of the loss of the relationship, and they want to jump into the next one,” Fleming says.
“It’s like when people lose a dog, and they want to go ahead and buy a new one.” easy, right? Plus your friends are telling you to “get back out there.” But while it sounds like a healthy idea, that strategy can seriously backfire.
“It’s sort of a protection or defense from feeling hurt,” says Megan Fleming, Ph. Emotionally unavailable folks are fiercely independent: They may not feel like they need anyone.
At some point, we’ve all been hit with a “Get-Out-of-a-Date-Free” card.Whether you’ve encountered someone with the issue or it’s become part of your own romantic repertoire, read on to find out the causes, symptoms, and steps to counter the all-too-common excuse.So what does the root of all romantic-comedy evil actually mean?Still, on the surface, emotionally unavailable people can appear to be very stable, says Elisabeth Mandel, LMFT, a relationship therapist based in Manhattan.“But if you can tell they are resisting changing emotional states, or they don’t have a lot of range, then there’s something threatening to them about emotions.” ), it is ultimately about control.
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Someone expressing enthusiasm to hang out with you is SUCH turn off. You’re conscious of sounding horrible, and aren’t entirely sure how to make yourself seem friendly, so litter your emails with exclamation marks and xxxs. I’m not being a dick.’ If people don’t make an effort, you won’t either, and you’ll never see each other again. You can’t just treat us like crap and assume we won’t get a little upset.